A 2008 study conducted by Florida State University Assistant Professor of Sociology, Kathryn Harker Tillman, says that adolescents who live with half-siblings or step-siblings tend to have lower academic grades and more negative behavioral issues in school.
The number of blended families is increasing across the US
Dan Snell, CEO and Founder of the American Blended Family Association (ABFA) wrote an open letter in Aug. 2008, to the 2008 Elective Office Candidates. In it Snell said that "Research studies confirm that by the year 2010, blended families will become the most common family structure in America." These statistics are certainly not unexpected. According to US National Center for Health Statistics, the divorce rate for 2005 was 3.6 (per 1,000 people) with 54% of divorced women remarrying within five years and 75% of divorced women remarrying within 10 years (2002).
Blended families typically consist of step-children, or step-children and half-siblings, should a remarried couple choose to introduce a new baby into the family. Certainly newly blended families face unique challenges including readjustment and upheaval that can be extremely difficult on existing children. While younger children seem to have an easier time of adapting, adolescents struggling with identity issues face heightened internal strife, as evidenced in the Berkeley Parents Network's, "Step-Parenting Teens."
Assistant Professor of Sociology Kathryn Harker Tillman of Florida State University believes that not all blended families are created equal. After studying data from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health on more than 11,000 adolescents in grades 7 through 12 across the US, Tillman told Newswire.com in 2008, that academically, "Adolescents with both half-siblings and step-siblings fare better than those who live with only step-siblings or only half-siblings."
Blended family issues do not always get better
Tillman's study, " Non-Traditional Siblings and the Academic Outcomes of Adolescents," published in the 2008 journal Social Science Research, reports that, "Youth in step-families often exhibit lower levels of academic achievement than do their peers in single-mother families." Furthermore, the gender apparently most affected by lower grades and behavioral issues is boys, who not only produced a lower GPA than girls, but also displayed issues of inattentiveness and poor socialization leading to behavioral issues.
"Part of what makes step-family life difficult for young people is the complexity, ambiguity and stress that come with having nontraditional siblings living in the same home," says Tillman and this leads to competition for attention from parents. This situation is unlikely to improve and Tillman cautions against assuming that everything will work out eventually, once children have adjusted. "Effects of new step-siblings or half-siblings may actually become more negative over time or, at the least, remain consistently negative," she says.
What parents can do to help teens adjust to a blended family?
Tillman's research may suggest the need for a more proactive parenting role before situations become irreparable. Dr. Susan S. Bartell, author of Stepliving for Teens: Getting Along with Step-Parents, Parents, and Siblings, says that the most difficult period is the first year of marriage.
In her article, " Help Your Teen Adjust to a Stepfamily," published at Focus Adolescent Services; Focusas.com, Bartell recommends that future blended families introduce step-siblings slowly. Keeping meetings short, sweet and structured is better until step-siblings feel relaxed with one another.
In the article "Stepparenting and Blended Family Advice," HelpGuide.org suggests that parents remember three key issues for newly blended families – being realistic, being patient and limiting expectations. Teens take a lot of time to adjust to new situations, meaning that things will not be perfect overnight. While parents can and should expect an adolescent to be respectful, it's likely that all of the giving and the loving will be very much one-sided for some time.
Finally, it is important to acknowledge that the potential for sibling rivalry may be heightened between step-siblings. Rather than seeing this as a negative, parents can view it as a tool for teaching step-siblings how to negotiate and resolve issues between themselves. Although step-children cannot be forced to get along, allowing a respectful freedom of expression gives teens an outlet, a voice and a possible resolution that could help pave the way, to a successfully blended family.
Note: All sources accessed September 2, 2010.
Elizabeth Batt - Elizabeth Batt is a former large animal nurse, certified NREMT, lover of equines and conservationist.
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